Behind The Worlds

The gravel under my feet is blue. The fields and rolling hills that surround the path are vividly purple. The floating mountains are covered with dark teal grasses and ivy that hangs off the rocky edges, their underside coated completely with a dark brown-green moss.

The mountains float seemingly at random, each peak isolated from the others and yet they also seem to float together. Like a herd of airborne granite, wandering yet remaining close.

There is a taste in the air, sweet as comfort. Almost too sweet. It places me on edge.

I’m looking for something, I know I will not find it with my eyes. I’ve never been here before. My instinct tells me this is the way to go.

“You weren’t going to leave me behind, were you?” Snake in his Kemetic form slips his hand around me. I look at the linen he is wearing and note he is barefoot.

“If you’re coming with me, then curl around my shoulders.” He changed form into a green snake and did just that. But there was something odd about how he did so. I just couldn’t put a finger on it.

I take a step. Ripples extend from my foot as if I stepped into water. The ripples grow and snap the ground apart. Springing from the sudden wounds in the earth are large creatures. A chimeric mix of frog, wolf, and eagle, they surround me on all sides. Armored with the same vivid purple color as the hills, I know they are guardians. They roar at me menacingly. I am not to pass. They make no move towards me, but their posture tells me they are ready for battle.

How nice.

I’m not.

In fact…

I don’t give a flying fuck.

“Not today, boys. We can fuck around some other time.” I walk through them easily, gently pushing one out of my way. They stand up in confusion. This isn’t what was supposed to happen. I was supposed to engage them. We fight. I might win, I might not. Symbolic test of wills, and such.

Except I know what they really are.

A distraction.

If I give in to the threat and engage in battle, neither one of us will win. I’ll be too busy enjoying the horrid odds to note the dwindling time. They will always have their numbers replenished.

“Oh. Okay. Uh… Later.” One of them feebly waves to me as I continue down the blue gravel path.

The mountains in the sky continue to drift at random. Nothing else accosts me. But then again, nothing else is there. Only the deeply vivid purple of the fields, the blue of the path, and the deep teal of the mountains. There is nothing else.

Nothing.

Another distraction.

I’ve been walking for several miles now. Right? I turn around to find I haven’t moved an inch from my starting point. The ripples and cracks have gone. The chimeric beasts are no where to be seen.

Snake has said nothing since coiling around my shoulders. Something about him still feels off. I ask him a question I do not know the answer to, but I am sure he does. It is the kind of question that I usually learn the answer by experience later, and for that reason he should refuse to answer because the words will mean nothing without the experience to provide understanding.

“I really don’t know. Maybe we’ll find out here.”

“Get down.” “What?”

“Get off me. If I have to pull you off, it will be in pieces.” “Why?”

“Because you are not Snake. You are another distraction. Maybe I created you so I wouldn’t feel alone in this new world. Maybe the world created you to keep me company as I adjust. But never mind the reason why, you’re not him. Get down, and let us part in peace. I carry enough lies as it is.”

I extended my arm downward, and the green snake used it to lower himself gently to the ground. “You’re lonely. And you’re scared. I meant no harm.” It coiled up its six feet of new-leaf-green on the blue gravel.

“I appreciate the sentiment.” I smiled. “I do. But I have to do this myself. Maybe we can keep each other company some other time.”

The snake flicked its tongue in thought. “Okay then. I’ll leave you be. But I would like your company… some other time… in the same peace as we part.” The snake turned and burrowed under the gravel in the blink of an eye.

Once again, I am alone.

I start once more down the path. I crest one hill, and come to an intervening valley. I turn around and find myself back at the beginning of the blue gravel path, at the crest of a hill. As if I never took a step. But while my physical location keeps resetting, the mountains don’t. They continue drifting as if in a different world than where I am.

I think about where the chimeric beasts came from, and where the imposter snake went to. I bend down, pinch the ground in front of me, and lift the reality of this world much like one lifts the curtain on a stage.

I am greeted to exuberant laughter.

“About time, girl! Won’t you come have a drink with me?” Sitting in the darkness behind the world are two rough made chairs. Sitting between the chairs, is a small, rough made table. Sitting on the table, is a top hat, a cane, a bottle of alcoholic drink of questionable quality, and two shot glasses. Sitting on one of the chairs, pouring said alcohol into the shot glasses, is the Rummer. One of the last entities I would expect to see here.

“And why is that, girl?” Oh, I’m thinking too loud again. “Yes, that too.” He holds out a filled shot glass to me. “Why not me? You know where I go, you know what I do. I take many forms, girl. I just like this one more than the others. I am always in the shadows. Always.”

I enter the darkness, allowing the reality to drape behind me and seal me in with the talking Momento Mori. As I take the glass, he offers me the empty chair. I take the empty chair after saluting him. I’m glad I took the chair before shotgunning the drink. I think my eyes crossed.

His laughter kept me from drifting too far away. “Well, you said you wanted stronger stuff! And I think you’re ready for it.” Oh-uh. He’s never one to say things simply. I raise my eyebrow in askance as I think, this isn’t just about rum.

He chuckles and takes the empty glass from my tightening grip. Placing it upside down on the table to indicate no more rum will be served to me this meeting, he nods. “Rum is good, but not the reason why you’re here. I know where your answer lies, girl. And I think you’re strong enough to go there, and come back.” The rum has set fire to my body, making it hard for me to remain sitting politely. He notices, and smiles.

He takes his cane and taps Horatio’s trinket hanging off my hip. “Come out, you! Your master needs your assistance. A shame I have to tell you this. Come out, you lazy lagabout! She is patient with you, I am not!” Horatio appears at my side and catches me as my body temperature drops suddenly. I’m now very cold and sluggish. I don’t need a mirror to know my lips are blue, or that my breathing is slowing dramatically down.

“Take her to the Edge, and wait for her there.” The Rummer pours himself another shot. “And remember, if she doesn’t take you to the Boneyard, you return to me.” He smiled as he licked the rim of the shot glass in anticipation. Horatio shuddered slightly.

“I will not abandon her, Sir.”

The Rummer did not answer, but downed the searing rum in one shot. As Horatio pulled me to my feet, the Rummer slammed the glass on the table. The sound sliced me in half. As Horatio led me away, I looked back to find my body slumped over the table, motionless and cold. The Rummer looked at me, and nodded.

…

…

“Your Grace, they have assembled and are waiting your entrance.” I opened my eyes at the equerry‘s voice. I didn’t turn towards him, only gently nodded to show I had heard him. I felt his cold hands removing my feathery shawl. “If your Grace would but turn, I shall see that your Grace’s arrival within is impeccable.” I sighed and complied, turning my back on the gray abyss.

“Must the feathers be put away? I am very fond of them, and consider them an extension of myself.” I didn’t care they didn’t match the black Victorian formal gown I was wearing. Or the black diamond that hung from my neck. Or the black lipstick that clung to my lips. Or the black veil that covered my face.

“If your Grace commands me to relinquish them, I shall. However, there is no other shawl like it, and while most of your Grace’s subjects are respecters of persons, there are those would risk dismemberment if it meant stealing even a corner’s loose thread. While your Grace reigns, the shawl is best kept locked away.

The equerry is dressed in a black tuxedo that reminds me of… someone… a man… that never was… I struggle to remember. He notices the look on my face and smiles as he straightens my dress and veil. “Your Grace does not have to enter right away. Ascending to the throne as quickly as your Grace has, I am sure your Grace is quite disorientated. Whatever life was left behind, probably still clings in fading shades of uncolor.” With subtle touches, he straightens my posture. I know that until I have settled in my kingdom, this man will be the power that guides me.

I chuckled, causing him to raise an eyebrow. He is a servant. A slave in pretty clothes and with pretty speech. He will be regarded as fortunate merely because he is in reach of my foot. He will be overlooked by many, and considered a bothersome nuisance as the rich and the powerful conspire around him. But here he is, showing me how to be regal. Pulling me into a position of greatness. He knows it. The way he smiles at me, tells me. I am the Queen. He is the power.

Until I fully come into my own, that is. And even then, even after I ruthlessly make examples of those that cross me, even after I establish my will as supreme, this… lesser… will always be my greater.

We all reign. We all serve.

Queen of what, though? I hear the murmurs of the assembled within… what is this place? I step back to look at the edifice, my back flush against the waist high railing of the balcony. A dark-wrought mansion? No, palace. My palace.

And what does my palace look over? I turned to view off the balcony.

Nothing. An abyss. Below me is a swirling mass of darkening grey. At its heart is an impossible black. My palace is the only thing here, in this abyss, where there is no color, where there is only…

“Equerry.” “My Queen.” “I’ve been here before.” “Yes, my Queen.” “But not as monarch.” “No, my queen. None have reigned until you decided to.”

Queen… of the Abyss… of the swirling… pit…

A sudden memory of color and sound brings me to my knees. “If I’m to be in the Pit, then I shall REIGN there and make it my own. To hell with so-called normal thought! If this is what I am, then I shall be the ultimate example of it!”

“Your Grace!” The equerry pulls me back to my feet and holds me gently. “Such memories… they will fade.” He smiles. “One day, your Grace, you will be ready to take the throne that waits for you.” He drapes my cloak over my shoulders. “That day is not today. The assembled will go on, and all will be kept ready. Go. Leave. I will be here should you return.”

I knew where I was now. What this palace, and the abyss it is built over, represents. I know who I am, and why the equerry insisted it be locked away while I rule. And I know why he suddenly returned it to me.

I burst into the form of a raven, and fly directly upward, into the pitch black sky, crying loudly in happy defiance and announcing my return to the worlds above. The darkness envelops me, and for a moment, I lose all sense of identity.

“Did you find what you were looking for, girl?”

“Yes. And no. I found answers, and many more questions.”

“Are you going to keep searching? Or are you done?”

“I’m not done yet.”

“Good.”

The darkness collapsed around me. I woke up with a jerk and a shout.

~~~

Make of that, what you may.