Some time ago, I was involved in a thing. And in the course of that thing, I had to run an item to Esse, with a crafting request. The item was ran, the request was given, but Esse would not make this thing without remuneration. He asked for something very personal from me.
Because of the circumstances and because of people involved, I consented, and gave him the object he desired.
When he returned to me with the finished object, he had a gift for me. He wanted the private item so he could use it as a template to make me a unique and personalized version. The item I surrendered was completely destroyed by his crafting. The item he replaced it with fit perfectly to the point where even I forget that this is a crafted item at times.
A short time ago, when Esse was crafting a war-scythe for another Otherworld Denizen, he tricked me into placing my bare hands into his forge. A special metal had been prepared and was waiting underneath the hot coals. When I plunged my hands into the coals to retrieve an “accidentally fallen” object, the metal reacted with my hands. I withdrew my hands to find a pair of gauntlets conforming to my skin and cooling rapidly in the air.
He laughed, teased me about being gullible, and nudged me to tell him, “Thank you.”, for the gift. I have written very little about them, for other than being as flexible as leather, as impervious to heat as the Space Shuttle under-tiles, and of a metal alloy I have never been able to identify, they have been inert. Custom fit war gauntlets that I can call onto my hands at a thought. When I am wearing the trollkona mask and form, and carrying the shield Esse also made for me, the gauntlets look like dark hued claws.
[The night of August 7th], I had some shit to work out. I know my temper. I know what happens when my emotions override my reason. I wanted to make sure that if I did lose control, there would not be any collateral damage, nor would I be vulnerable in my madness.
I went to the Seal Chamber in the depths of the lair. Once upon a time, the seal engraved in the perfectly smooth floor here was carved into the mountain terrace. Once the truth of the terrace was exposed, K* moved the seal to a chamber within the lair. Here I could play with my magics as I pleased, and none of K*’s brethren would have to put up with my juvenile antics. Here, I could literally seal myself within a magic circle, and only logical thought would be able to release me from it. No amount of rage or unchecked power would unlock it once placed.
To my surprise, I worked out the issues fairly quickly. Much of it was easily triggered and quickly misplaced anger. All that was really needed was for me to purge myself of the accumulation of Special Snowflake detritus that I had picked up from various social media websites. A few reality checks and careful introspection, and I was laughing at myself for allowing trivial and unimportant things to crawl under my skin.
So, here I am, in the middle of a reinforced area, isolated from all things delicate, in a bunker made for containing my explosive temper. Oh, what ever shall I do?
I shall play, that’s what. Combinations of weapons and enhancements that I would have been loathe to try any place else for fear of collateral damage, I was trying with excessive amounts of fun. I had long quit trying to be methodical with my attempts. I wanted big booms and I was getting them.
After making my ears ring yet again from the fading bouncing shock waves, I found myself calling the war gauntlets to hand. I had never tried to wield the feathersword while wearing them, as since I had made the Black Axe, I would wield that when in Esse’s service.
I called the feathersword to my metal-coated hands, and began the process of acquainting myself to the change in grip. The feathersword slipped around in my hands until the gauntlets conformed to my will and changed texture to securely hold the calamus hilt. Once I did so, it was as if I had no gauntlets on my hands at all, and I was able to swing and throw the feathersword with wonderful impunity.
My anger was long spent. I was playing now. I would occasionally throw myself against the walls of the seal, only to be thrown back with equal force. I laughed. It was good to be able to cut loose like this. Good to explore what I can do and good to find my limits without placing myself in danger.
The gauntlets took up as much bulk as a pair of latex gloves. I forgot I was wearing them. I thought of another thing I wanted to try with the feathersword and changed my clothing to accommodate the idea. In the process, the object that Esse had replaced came to the fore.
It started glowing.
The gauntlets started glowing.
The feathersword started glowing.
Before I had the presence of mind to separate the three objects, they reacted. There was a bright flash of light and I felt something shift around and on my skin. I fell to my knees and heard a clang as something metallic collided with the smooth granite of the floor.
I thought it was the sound of the new boots, as they do have a knee shield in place. But as I looked down, I saw none of the usual clothing items. I saw none of my clothing items. I stood carefully, as my footing had changed. The feathersword was gone. No amount of calling it to my hand could make it appear. I looked around in dismay and realized I wasn’t using my eyes.
I couldn’t.
I was blinded by a helm. I could see in all directions at once. Only my assumption of binocular vision was restricting what I processed to a narrow field in front of me. Once I stopped trying to see with human eyes, I saw everything.
The seal was still in place. The barriers it afforded were still erect. Nothing within the seal had been damaged. I turned my attention to myself and found the motif of the feathersword was all over the suit of armor I was now wearing. Made of the same impervious and flexible material as the gauntlets and the personalized item that Esse made, the armor covered me completely except for the lower part of my face.
I verbally called for the feathersword and felt the armor hum in answer. On a whim, I licked the armor on my arm. It tasted like the feathersword. I stood in the safety of the seal in silent stupor at the realization the gauntlets, Esse’s item, and the feathersword had merged into the armor I was now wearing.
“You can separate them, you know.” I turned to see who dared to intrude into the chambers and found K* standing beyond the seal. “Surprised?”
“Yes. [K*]. I am surprised. You knew they fit together somehow, and you’ve been waiting for me to find out on my own.”
Ke smiled and bowed. “Forgive me, I could not tell you beforehand. You had to discover this yourself, if you discovered it at all.”
It may seem a serious breach of protocol for kir to be here in this chamber. But ke helped carve it out, and moved the seal from the terrace to the chamber. Ke will always have a ‘key’ to come here, just as I will always have a key to the terrace. But like how I am restricted from proceeding past the terrace without permission, K* will not be able to enter the lair beyond without my leave.
“Esse made [the item] and the gauntlets. But you held on to the feathersword until…” The gears started spinning furiously in my head. This wasn’t my first lifetime. Too many entities have implied that they knew me from before this life. A few have said outright as such. K* held the feathersword until I proved myself capable of wielding it in this lifetime. Esse knows me better than I know myself. Esse knew me before…
When my thoughts spilled out of my mouth, my voice was flat. “Esse made the feathersword. He made all three items. Just in different lifetimes, from my point of view.” K* smiled. “Oh. Well. What for?” K*’s smile faded.
“First, show me you are able to separate the items.”
“How the fuck do I do that, when I don’t even know how I put them together?” As I was asking, I started checking myself for anything that felt out of place. “Just where is the zipper pull on this thing?” He did not laugh. After looking for and failing to find a physical trigger, I thought on what I was thinking the moment before they merged. I had been trying different gear combinations, and thinking how best to use certain items with certain other items.
So, it felt right to say that if thought combined them, then thought would separate them. I held my hand out, and thought of the three items unbound and separate. I closed my eyes in reflex and closed my hand.
The calamus hilt of the feathersword was soft in my gauntlet palm. My face was freed as the armor flashed and dissipated. The [item] returned to its inert state.
“Merge them again.” I nodded in compliance at K*’s command. It took me a few tries to get the right thought process in play, but once again I was encased in the pliant armor.
“Separate them.” This time it took no force of concentration to do so. I willed it, and it was done.
K* had me practice merging and separating them several times until he was satisfied I had control over the separate items and the combined armor.
“Remain in the lair if you can tonight. Rest up. There are others that need to see what you have. [Esse’s] part in this is complete. I will summon you to the terrace for mine.”
He left before I could ask him any questions.
~~~
August 8th, 2013 @ 12:24pm
I felt the tugging on my spirit. I knew clearly who was calling. However, I was in line at the post office at the moment and didn’t have the luxury of closing my eyes for five hot seconds. I hurled thoughts at kir in hopes of putting off what ke was asking of me. “[K*], I can’t. Not right now. I’m in public.”
“I know. That’s why right now. Split your awareness. You don’t need to be completely at the terrace.” Ke pulled on my spirit just enough to encourage splitting my awareness without risking pulling my full consciousness away.
“Can it wait?”, I whined, looking to bystanders as if I was taking an impatient sigh. “I really need my full attention on what I’m doing.” I had other errands to run that could not be postponed. Driving was involved.
“No. They have already started gathering. Split your awareness. All you need to do is be present enough for them to see what has come about.” Ke pulled harder. I knew ke would not willfully endanger me if ke could help it. But it was clear that those that have gathered were of enough rank to force kir hand if necessary.
Fine. I split my awareness and hoped I didn’t sound like a dolt at the counter.
I stepped onto the very bright terrace. The sunless sky was glowing with power, and the assembled hosts were adding to the ambient light. K* led me to the middle of the terrace and bid me to duplicate the actions that caused Something New to happen last night. I did, and the Something New happened again.
Around me, the assembled hosts watched silently. Some were intrigued by the armor. Some set their jaw with intense disapproval. K* guided me to my knees and knelt on the ground in front of me. “Nothing will happen to you. Right now, this is only observation. Do what you need to do in the physical realms. You’ll remain here with me. I will not allow anything to happen to you.”
And that’s where I have been since this morning.
~~~
August 8th, 2013 @ 4:18pm
My awareness is still split. I’m only being allowed to note what is happening in front of me. The only face I recognize is K*. Ke is allowing my hands to rest on kirs. The touch is comforting. I’m not threatened or under the shadow of implied violence, but what’s going down is discomforting as fuck.
They are remaking my armor, with me in it.
They are remaking me.
I can see glimmers of glory streaming past my head, and I am having a very hard time remaining calm.
But my friend is here. Who knows what’s going on. Ke is not panicking.
And because I trust my friend, neither will I.
August 8th, 2013 @ 8:57 pm
They’re done at the terrace. Things have been… altered. All that’s left is for me to bring my full awareness to the terrace.
I’m prevented from taking further peeks until I bring all my awareness to the terrace.
It’s been made clear to me, that when I come to the terrace, expect to be there a while. “It would be prudent to finish any necessary physical interactions before committing to coming [to the terrace].”
What happens after I arrive will determine what is written publicly.
Right now, all I can say with comfort, is that at the end of the day, I am no longer surprised to see Esse’s hand in this.
~~~
August 9th, 2013 @ 8:24am
No, I didn’t get much (restful) sleep last night. Before being forcibly taken to the terrace, I was forcibly (but pleasantly) hijacked. Of that conversation, I will only publicly admit to being given a hug. It was a good hug.
The good news is I did not panic (much) when seeing what the aftermath was. The bad news is they are still not allowing me to see the entire outcome. The ugly, is they are holding that information captive until I can show I can do a thing in the physical world.
I have to draw a… crest.
I have to draw.
I can’t draw a straight line, y’all that saw the sun symbols can testify in court on that fact. And now I have to draw something that has specific straight lines in some areas and specific curved lines in other areas?
I don’t think I’ll ever find out what the fuck happened on the terrace.
Where the hell is that coffee? ~slams empty cup on table~
~~~
August 10th, 2013 @ 9:59am
The angels at the terrace tried to tell me what happened, but my fear drowned them out. They tried to show me but my fear blinded me. I cried because I did want to know but I didn’t know how to deaden my deep fears.
So the angels told me a story about a girl, her regent, her guardian, and the Iron Kingdom that was hers by right but she had to reclaim.
And I understood.
~~~
August 15th, 2013
Epilogue.
All I will say publicly, is that there is a new entry to my resumé. Angelus.
There are different kinds of holiness. There are different kinds of glory.
What mine is, I will find out in time.