I need a night to recover from last night. I’m more tired waking up than when I went to bed! And more than a little concerned.
I did not answer Ravenwoman’s summons.
I went to see the Svartalf instead.
And now the doll is missing, but the black shard is still there. Snake is bullshitting confusing me, and I don’t remember anything that happened after I opened the Svartalf’s front door.
I opened door. I announced myself. I stepped through. I open my eyes to find I’m in my lair, kneeling on the pallet, with Snake asking if maybe I should try some other time as I seem very tired. Da fuq?
Snake is telling me I never even left the lair, but he went with me!
I’ve split my awareness before, being in different dream worlds at the same time. So if there was only one Snake, I could see why he insists I had not left the lair. But…
Wait.
Fuck.
What did I write yesterday? “Tricksters [change faces] like water does wet.”
When at the Svartalf door, I asked Snake why he didn’t tat himself into my shoulder so we couldn’t be separated. He said it wasn’t necessary and he didn’t want to. Snake is usually three times more prudent than me. He didn’t want to? Or he couldn’t do it?
A part of me remained at the lair with Real Snake. The active part of me went to the Svartalf with a trickster.
My ass. It has been played.
~copious expletives~
I’ll save the wild speculation for after coffee. Right now I’m pissed.
Edited To Add:
Okay, now I have some coffee and am thinking things through. This wasn’t a simultaneous event, it was linear. I went to the Svartalf’s door with Not Snake first. The door opened. My memory is scrubbed of everything that happened after I passed over the threshold. I wake up back in the lair, with Real Snake telling me to stay put for the night. That was the first time Real Snake had seen me all night.
I’m still pissed.
But I’m more amused than pissed.
Because I know of two entities that would have been able to enter the lair and trick me like that. And one of them smells of sandalwood and jasmine.
~more coffee~
Edited after more coffee to add:
If it seems like I was rambling when I posted this. I was. When I started typing things out I was still very confused and had just woken up. I was eager to get as many notes down as I could because I was concerned I would forget more than I already had.
As I was typing though, I started to piece things together. So what you have written above is a documentation of the stream of consciousness I experienced while typing it out. If you had been sitting with me, this is what I would have been pelting your ears with.
Sometimes I do my best thinking completely alone. Sometimes I have to write shit out and see how it falls together. This post such as.
And yes, I do realize there are probably more entities that could get into the lair and masquerade as Snake long enough to fool me. But the payoff is not worth it to them. And I tend to have an explosive anger when I find out I’m being tricked/manipulated.
What I should have done is ask Faux Snake to touch me. (He never did.) I would have known at once if that was Snake or not.
What I will not do is get paranoid about the lair. There are other things left unwritten, and they shall remain so.