I pushed myself too far physically yesterday and was rewarded for my inattention with a series of small, annoying fits. I was reviewing y’all name suggestions to Top Hat Spider when he interrupted me. “Lie down. Now. Bed or floor, but lie down now.”
Oh hey, memory skips. A minute here. A few seconds there. Strobe light memory.
Not quite awake, I remember looking up to see he had come partly off the wall I was against. Two legs were holding my shoulder, but he wasn’t watching me. I never did see what he was throwing a stink-eye at. His posture was protective, though. I wasn’t worried.
But we didn’t finish going through names. He’s still “brightly amused” that I’m making such a fuss and that y’all are indulging me.
Okay, okay. I get the hint. To bed with me. At once Snake coiled around me in a predator’s grip. “I’m not allowing you to leave the lair tonight. You’re physically unstable and likely to be mad as a hatter because of it.” I had no intention of going anywhere as it was, so I hugged him with a child’s strangling grip and squealed, “Teddy!”.
“Too late. She’s already insane.” We both laughed. But he didn’t release me. The knot our bodies made comforted me and deeper sleep came quickly.
I dreamt I heard a noise in the basement garage. I went downstairs to find a government agency had set up an operation in one corner. Squatters had claimed one area. A business had sent diggers to install unwanted services to the house with plans to bill me for it later. A foreign government had sent a crew to establish a foothold in yet another area, so they can claim diplomatic privileges. And all these people had gotten into my food stores and ate up my stock!
They all looked up at me with “What? I’m just following orders!” face. Each group intentionally ignoring the others. Each group telling me I have to talk to their boss, who won’t be in the office until next week. In the meantime, I have to leave MY basement because security/hazard/diplomatic incident/bullshit.
Suddenly, everyone ducks down. I’m pulled behind a car and shushed. “See. No one here. We can hold the deal here.” A group of American mobsters and Japanese Yakuza come in. The other groups scramble to hide themselves.
I start for the stairs back up when I realize (1) I’m running from my house, (2) I’m dreaming. Fuck everything about this!
I storm back into the basement, full on pissed. The mob men point guns at me but I wave my hand and the guns fly out the hole the diggers have made.
“All of you! Get the fuck out my house! Now!” Everyone tried to hide in shadows, now more afraid of me than the Yakuza. I screamed in anger and the walls and ceiling glowed. Everyone was exposed.
“I said, ‘GET! OUT!’” A mobster came at me with a knife. A gesture from me caused a great wind to pick him off his feet and throw him out the open garage door. “And take your shit with you! Anything left behind will be destroyed and any bill collectors will be eaten!”
The remaining Yakuza looked at me, then told the American mobsters, “Even we know not to anger gods. You’re on your own.” They took their gear, bowed an apology to me (that I accepted), and left quickly. The foreign country’s men gathered their gear and quietly left. Only the last of them whispered an apology as he left. The diggers said they weren’t paid enough for this bullshit and started to leave. But I made them repair the wall before they left. The covert ops tried to claim “National Security”. When my anger melted their gear, they decided they could best serve their country far away from me. I thought the squatters were the last. There were other groups I had not seen at first. They all realized I would eat them if they remained, and left at once.
Finally, the garage is empty. Unfortunately, so is my food stores. I close the garage doors, and lock them with my own personal touch. Going back upstairs, I turn off the lights.
And wake up in Snake’s embrace. I’ve feathered out from head to toe in sleek black raven feathers. He’s looking at me amused. “I can tell when something has pissed you off in a deeper dream. You always fledge.” I mutter obscenities, which only increases his mirth. Batting him with a winged arm in mock battle, he shivers from giggling.
Nothing left to do but wait out the alarm clock.
Good morning.