Dream: Whose Leash?

Been sitting on this all day. A long day to wait. A short writeup to hammer out. A good beer to assuage my self with.

As the dream starts, I have everything under control. Every. Thing. My job, my coworkers, my family, my peers, my servitors, the spirits that speak to me in dreams, everything. At first, all appears to be going precisely the way I want it to be.

As I look around, I see my level of control represented by ethereal leashes connecting me to those around me. Is my sister being too demanding of me? Verbally, I tell her to back off. In the aether, I see me giving her leash a short controlling jerk. I am amused by the representation, and allow it to feed my ego.

I make the decision to leave the repetitious habits and haunts and find new things to get in trouble with. To do so, I must break away from those that currently serve me. I summon forth the representative leashes and try to drop them all.

But I’m caught fast. The leashes are attached to my hands.

As I try to live my days, trying to change from the pattern of behaviours I had engaged in before, I find a horrible truth. Those around me had become so accustomed to my behaviour, they would not allow me to behave differently than I had before. I had carved out a role in their life, and by hell, I would continue to play that role.

Instead of controlling the myriad factors of my life, I am now being controlled by those same factors.

The very leash I used to control others was now controlling me.

My last thought in the Dreaming, was crying out in anguish from being bound by my own hubris. The various forces of my life jerking hard upon the leash, driving me to live by their desires.

~~~~

The sun was not gentle upon my eyes. The sheet was wrapped tight around neck and arms. It served to punctuate the distressing dream I was wrenched from.

Lesson of the day: “The same leash you use to control others can control you as well.”