More Disjointed Scenes

Yea, so, earlier today I went away again. Two weeks of nonstop stress + fever? I’m surprised it didn’t happen sooner. So I went round the way and came back with the most disjointed series of images. What follows are the scenes I could remember clearly on waking.

• Walking in a cemetery. It’s just after dusk, and it’s raining lightly. My walking companion is holding an umbrella over us. I turn to see who it is, and start to sputter apologies. He tells me to shut up, keep walking, and enjoy the peace and quiet.
• Salt flats again. But I’m pissed at the storm now. I summon fire and am now surrounded by a vortex of molten salt and heat. Again, my awareness splits and two outcomes occur simultaneously.
1. The vortex collapses on me, and I am consumed by the molten salt.
2. The storm is unable to pierce my fire shield. I deploy the wings of the cloak and ride the thermal out of the storm and away from the Salt Flats.
• Ice skating on the Frozen World again. See the End of the World approaching. Turn around and try to get on land. The Frozen World collapses under me and I fall anyway. I manage to turn around and watch the Sun. It pulses, but does not supernova. Instead…
• A red cloaked, golden curled, rosy cheeked, youthful appearing spirit comes out of nowhere and grabs me. I know this person. I know I can’t escape it. I just sigh and surrender without a fight. It laughs, kisses me, and pushes me out of that world.
• I am watching various scenes from my life, but from a spectator’s point of view. I am of the form of a 5 year old child. There are two adults with me, watching as the scenes change. On my right, stands No Man. On my left, holding my left hand with her right hand, is my adult self. Adult Keri has the same marked hand, marked eye, and feather cloak. But Adult Keri has a lot of other things that I don’t want to detail here.
• Adult Keri chides me for trying to play grown up. There are things I have to do first. Pieces I have to find. A skull I have to feed. A cord I have to finish. A pig I have to call.
• No Man carries 5 year old me to Snake’s lair. I’m transferred to Snake’s coils. “Welcome home. Do that again, I’ll hurt you.” Snake puts me to bed.

I wake up, still feverish, but feeling a little better inside. Still not going to play with scorpions, though. Also, somewhere in that mess of scenes was this conversation:

No Man: “You know who has a boar for his symbol…”

Me: “No, I’m done playing Pantheon Pickup. I need to do this for myself, or I’ll wind up in servitude again.”

No Man: “So, you’re not going to seek out Odin after all?”

Me: “Yes, I am. I have to. The cord was his quest, after all. It’s not completed yet.”

No Man: “You know that means dealing with Loki.”

Me: “Fuck Loki.”

No Man: “Such irreverence! And to think you once held him in such high regard. Is the illusion shattered, yet?”

Me: “Which one? The one where I pine for a deity that reflects me? The one where I yearn for a master to submit to? Or the one that thinks she’s all grown up and won’t open her eyes to the fact she’s being played just as much now as when she was an ignorant fuck?”

No Man: “Yes.”

I guess I should explain the leap between who has a boar for his symbol, and Odin. Neither I nor my conversant was claiming Odin has a boar. Rather, it was my conversant changing the subject slightly, from discussing the Norse pantheon in general, to the fact I still have an unfinished quest for Odin. I didn’t think I needed to explain that when I originally posted this on Tumblr. But a few private questions about it has spurred this (non) explanation.

Another correction between the Tumblr post and this post. I never did get that alcohol. Maybe later. But I do want something stronger than honey whiskey next time I’m at BevMo.