Tarot: CC "I’m screwed, tell me something new."

Things have been… tumultuous… in my life lately. This morning’s audience with Jupiter being more a mere symptom than a continued cause. (His advice, on the other hand… oh boy.) I had a quiet moment during lunch and wanted to spread out tarot cards, but I had no space to do so.

It’s good I have the Beautiful Tarot app on my timewaster toy iTouch [1]. I threw down a Celtic Cross, thinking I’ll save the image and dwell over it as the day progresses. Give my subconscious something to hook onto, then drag it back to the surface this evening (or in a lucid dream tonight).

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Vision: Of Jupiter & Mars

Greeting Sol this morning, basking in the sunshine while offering my adorations, I felt a distinct presence behind me. In a sudden moment of vision, the presence of Jupiter coldly stared at me.

“You’ve been running again. Stop that. If you act in Fear, you will only harm yourself. If you act in Love, you will grow regardless of results.”

Fixated by the sun’s rays, I could not turn to face the planet’s presence. But I had to ask. “What am I running from?”

“Your anger.”

“I have a fierce temper, I try to keep it locked down.” The scars on my knuckles speak volumes.

“No, you run from it in Fear of harming others. Confront your Fear.” The inaudible voice is cool and calm.

“And how might I do that?”

“There is help, you have only to ask.” The presence of Jupiter fades. Before me, somewhat offset of the sun, I feel another planetary presence bloom. Mars.

Oh hell. Talk about fighting fire with fire. This should be an interesting day.

Dream: Verdant Mound

This dream occurred in the afternoon of March 5th, 2010. It is my first entry to the Birch Grove, the same where I broke the bindrune. A close friend remarked, in that rendition, I appeared oddly vulnerable. I certainly feel vulnerable posting this. But the writing has remained tucked away long enough, and now demands to be revealed. In time, I’ll move the rendition to the proper posting date.

~~~

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Idling: Vain Worry

I sometimes wonder if my mishmash of magick styles is self-defeating. I bounce between base elemental, theurgy, thaumaturgy, ceremonial, chaos, planetary, and my own bastard spice.

I’ve assumed godheads, and yet am the thrall of a god. Quite the contradiction, it appears. Yet it works for me.

I suppose, in the end, that’s what matters. Am I doing what works for me? Yes. Then I should stop worrying about it.

Dream: Breaking The Bindrune

Laid down for an afternoon nap. The past couple nights have not been kind to me, and I needed a quick recharge. I laid down in my bed, alone in the house. The sound suddenly shifts around me, the air becomes cooler, and I get the sense I am not alone.

I reach out and feel I am laying on a bundle of freshly cut branches, covered with a cloth. I didn’t remember falling asleep. I merely closed my eyes and I was no longer in my home.

Opening my eyes, I prop on one arm to see I am laying on a green cloth, but with my pillow and my blanket with me. I hear a noise over me and turn towards the source.

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Fixing Things: This Place Be Jumping!

Did some digging and found how to post “summaries” to the main page. So those occasional long posts (read: 95%) will have a few paragraphs to allow you, dear reader, to determine if clicking through to another two thousand word monstrosity is worthwhile.

I’ll be going back through the (thankfully) short archives and adding the feature to all the long posts. Eventually. Once I finish the day’s chores. Nevermind, all done. If I missed a post, let me know. I’ll get it if I don’t get distracted by NaNoWriMo or Kitsu Saga.

If you see anything particularly egregious, or have suggestions for widgets that would improve readability, drop me a line or leave a comment. I can’t fluff my ego if I have no one reading, after all.