The King of Thieves

I knew I was dreaming. That didn’t make living in the orphanage any more tolerable. The staff gave us the lowest level of care required by the state. We had something a little softer than the floor to sleep on. We each had one set of clothes with our names on it. And we ate the recommended amount of calories every day, just in expired foodstuffs that often had mold on it. Occasionally, we would receive care packages from various organizations around town. All tax-deductible of course. No one bothered to see if we enjoyed the reminders that we were throwaway children. No one bothered to see if we actually received the reminders at all. Often we wouldn’t even know we had received anything. Any donations were taken away for “inspection” and never returned. The staff kept everything that was worth keeping. Bastards.

I managed to steal a laptop back from them. Never handled one before. Good thing I stole it while it was still in the box, for I never knew they needed charging and a power cord after all. But it didn’t take long for me to learn how to use it. The orphanage has a wireless Internet point? Not surprising. I learned how to hide the laptop on the network. I learned a lot of things. There’s a whole world out there, while they lock us up… no… lock us away.

The town tries to keep the image of the perfect little city. Families are welcome, as long as they are “normative”. The ruling class here wants to maintain a certain… ambiance. Anything that is not in alignment with their idea of perfection is chased out or locked up. Men are men, and women are submissive for it. Single parents are shamed, and their children taken away. Children without families, are sent to orphanages like mine, or work camps. What’s scary is so many willfully follow along. They don’t question, because they’ve never been taught to question. Any hint of discontentment is quickly covered.

As far as the ruling class was concerned, I would toil here in ignorance. If I survived, I would be sent to a trade school, or the military. If I came back, I would take a menial job that barely paid the rent. As far as the ruling class was concerned, I wasn’t worth the trouble. But I learned knowledge is power. I’m still a minor, the laws are stacked against me. But I’m an orphan, there is no one to shame by my actions. So I became the King of Thieves. I and a few choice boys (I was a boy myself), started to sneak out of the orphanage. We didn’t leave for good, we were determined to raise living conditions for ourselves and others. We would sneak out empty handed and return with different stuff. Most of it stolen or scavenged. Food, clothes, books were primarily what we brought in. My fellows were hungry for them all. I and the others that snuck out were putting ourselves in grave danger, but all the others helped to cover us up.

I was the King of Thieves. Outside the orphanage, some had discovered us, but instead of revealing us, they also helped. Placing goods in secret drop spots, providing hiding places when the police stumbled across us. I found the populace at large was not happy with the ruling class after all, but because they were kept scattered, none felt confident in raising their voices. I felt invincible. A modern day Robin Hood. But like Robin Hood, I knew my reign would not last. I made plans for the day of my discovery.

The groundskeeper had checked on the bays for the night. The illusion was perfect, he announced that all boys had been accounted for. But instead of heading straight for his home like he usually does, he suddenly came around the building. Peeking into the bushes, he saw where I was lurking. His eyes widened at the discovery. I didn’t wait for his reaction, I ran. Even though I got away physically, I knew my kingdom was undone. I sounded the alarm that told the others to distance themselves from me. Make it look like I acted alone. They knew to betray me to the authorities. They knew to tell them all my “plans”. Plans that made it look like I acted alone, and did not reveal the network of help I was receiving outside the orphanage. For the good of all, let me be sacrificed. And while the authorities clapped each other on the back about wringing my neck, the boys will carry on what I have started.

The King of Thieves will die. The King of Thieves lives on.

I had hiding spots throughout the neighborhood. Most of them, shared by other boys. I avoided the shared ones. Changing clothes, getting a rooted tablet, adding a quick disguise, I changed my appearance. But the local police had sicced their top investigator on my ass. The King of Thieves had embarrassed them, and raised the ire of the ruling class. I became Most Wanted in the town, for upsetting the Peace and Mind of the People.

Yes, that’s one of the charges against me. I upset the mind of the people by causing discontentment. I made a lot of people question the treatment of the orphans, and the accountability of the staff. That was the hole in the dam, the slow leak that gradually ate away at the pretty flowering bank. Now folks are questioning everything about the way they are ruled and the ruling class is feeling vulnerable. The ruling class can’t allow me to remain free for long. The King of Thieves must be captured.

The manhunt was unbelievable. They emptied the police headquarters and poured every available officer onto the street. With each announcement, I was portrayed even more dastardly and heinous than before. I dragged it out as long as I could. I knew if I stayed in the town, I would be caught. But with each news conference, more were questioning why so many resources were being used to catch one boy, whose only crime was trying to care for other throwaway children. With each news conference, the press were allowed to ask fewer and fewer questions. With each news conference, the viewers were forced to face the ruling class’ real sentiment towards them. The more I could drag out the manhunt, the more dirt washed out of the dam.

The ruling class was undoing themselves with all this attention focused on me. But they, and the Investigator, didn’t care about that. I was a Wanted Criminal that defied the Way Things Should Be. The King of Thieves had to be caught! Dead or alive, it didn’t matter, but he must be caught!

I kept them going for days and days. But I started to run out of stockpiles resources. I wouldn’t be able to get more without risking exposing the rest of the network. Time to get the hell out of Dodge. The Investigator cornered me in a building. He set the building on fire to flush me out. Shit. I jump into the dead end alley, hoping to use the smoke as cover. If I can make it to a sewer manhole, I can get out of the town. But he’s standing on the manhole. Fuck. I’m cornered.

He gloats for a bit as I’m illuminated by several spotlights. Behind me the fire rages. I can feel the flames through the bricks. I refuse to surrender. I’m the King of Thieves, dammit. I bend to no one. An officer draws his weapon, but the Investigator tells him to put it away. “We only shoot dangerous people. Let the dogs deal with dogs.” He orders attack dogs to be released. They come baying past him, headed straight for me. But I knew these dogs. I would slip them treats, and made sure they knew my scent. I wasn’t some dangerous criminal, I was that kid with the beef jerky. I was that kid that gave belly rubs. They ran up to me, and laid down in peaceful abiding. To them, this was the best reunion ever.

The Investigator’s face twitched. He ordered remote control drones to come in and shoot me down. It was obvious I had something on me that affected others. Wasn’t safe to take me in person. Obediently, the drones flew overhead. Using the wireless tablet, I overrode the controlling frequencies. Suddenly disconnected from the command center, the drones failsafe programming took effect and they landed, harmless and disabled.

Furious, the Investigator came after me himself. He didn’t want anyone to have the glory of bringing me in. I knew I probably would not survive the experience. But I will die as the King of Thieves. I will die with a better life than what the ruling class wanted for me. And I will die in the public eye.

The Investigator had ignored what was happening behind him. He didn’t see the citizens with their phones, recording live video. He didn’t see the journalists with their cameras. He didn’t see visitors from other towns, watching in shock as the large man bore down on a thin, almost emaciated boy. He didn’t see the envoy from the City. I saw them all. When I saw the envoy from the City, I realized where I was in the Dreaming, and who I really am. It was very hard not to burst into laughter. I knew how I was going to end this. Time to weave a new myth.

“I’m going to teach you a lesson, boy! You’re going to be put in your place, and then you will die! Ain’t no throwaway punk going to be uppity without consequence!” The Investigator has a baton in his hand. I know he means to beat me, then sodomize me. That’s why they keep the orphans, really. As sex toys for the ruling classes. Because who gives a shit, we don’t have family, we don’t have worth.

I stand as close to the heated brick wall as I can. I want him to approach me. I need the billowing smoke to fall between us and the cameras. Still a boy, I calmly respond. “No. You won’t. No. I won’t. The tapestry of lies, deceit, and control that you and the ruling class had used to keep everyone in control is fraying and falling apart. The people have others to look up to now. Folks from without. Folks from within. The worlds are watching, Investigator. Don’t bring shame on your head.” I nodded to the City’s envoy. The envoy nodded back.

He is as agitated as I was calm. “Fuck them! They don’t rule over us! And fuck you! You little shit! You think you accomplished something? You’re nothing but justification why the lower classes are worthless and need to be beaten.”

He reaches for me greedily, but his hand passes through my body as if I were only an illusion. He staggers back and stares at me in shock. “You can’t touch me, Investigator. I am the King of Thieves. You can’t touch me, no matter what form I take. I have risen because the ruling class has fallen. I am king, because they have lost their honor. I am the King of Thieves, and I am beyond you.”

I bowed, then called my feather cloak around me, completely removing me from the Investigator’s sight. From the viewpoint of the witnesses, a great plume of smoke descended and took me away. The dogs started to bay and howl at my disappearance, they can’t sense me anymore. Invisibly, I walked past him, past the dogs, and past the backup officers that were rushing forward to assist the Investigator. I walked past the citizens hurrying to upload their video, past the street journalists making hasty summations for the evening news, past the visitors that were calling their homelands with what they had witnessed. Out of respect, I nodded at the envoy as I passed by invisible. Surprisingly, he nodded back, but quite discreetly though, so not to give me away. The smirk the envoy had, could shame the dawn into darkness.

Several blocks away, I put away the cloak, stepping once more into tangible form. But the form that emerged was different. I had changed my appearance by will alone. Still a boy, though. I didn’t want to give away any more about me than necessary. I was taller and older. Still a teenager, but in clean clothes and a laid back appearance. I looked nothing like the King of Thieves that had eluded the Investigator. Nothing like the images of the “Wanted Criminal”.

I pulled a skateboard out of my bag and started riding down the street, humming contentedly to myself. Four teens were hanging around down the street. When I passed them, they jumped onto skateboards of their own and chased after me. “Hey, boy! Hold up! I want to talk to you!”

I came to a stop, but said nothing. They fanned out in front of me, blocking my advancement, but leaving my rear open. An intimidation technique. The largest of the four looked me over with a bit of concern. “You’re… different. You’re not from around here. You’re from the City.” I nodded, and noted they were in their own disguises. I couldn’t see through the deception, though. None of us were the 17 year old boys we appeared to be. The speaker took a hard look at me, trying to spy through my disguise as I was trying to spy through his. He reminds me of someone I saw over year ago. Someone that was a threat to me then. He identified me before I could confirm my suspicion. “Fuck. Weaver. You’re Weaver!” His voice had a timbre of awe, surprise, and fear. Like he stumbled into a unlocked room of treasure. Like he was waiting for the guard to appear at any moment.

“Perhaps.” My only answer. I did not want to be trapped by my words. The others mistook my prudence for capitulation. They wanted to test me. They heard I could rip out their hearts. They heard I talked to trees. They heard Hell couldn’t hold me. Here was this person they had heard so many myths about, and they outnumbered her, four to one. Just think of their fame when others hear they kicked Weaver’s ass!

But the speaker paused, and told them not to touch me. Silently he sized me up. “Yea, you are. You really are Weaver. I heard you was a girl, but guess not. Sorry to bother you, Weaver. We won’t keep you. I’m sure you have some shit to stir up on your own, you don’t need us on your back as well.” He backs away slightly and bows his head. The others start to berate him until they look at me. Then they back off as well.

That’s when I realized I had a predatory look of my own. I recognize these guys. I remember them. I remember how I was afraid of them, then. And I know I can hurt them now. I almost want them to lay a hand on me, to give me justification for rending them in pieces. Payback is a bitch.

“Here, for you, Weaver.” The speaker hands me a foil wrapped object that was the size of an orange. I knew it to be a trap of some sort, but I played along. “No hard feelings, right?” Oh yeah, it’s a trap. I know better than to accept it. Considering this was the same tactic I had pulled on Loki a few weeks ago.

I didn’t answer, but allowed the trap to trigger anyway. The foil exploded and I found my right hand engulfed in something like a tribble with teeth. At once the tribble starts trying to chew on my hand. The ‘boys’ start whooping and laughing and high-fiving themselves. That was so awesome! They pranked Weaver! I know, right! Right? Uh…

I know what the critter is supposed to look like. But after seeing the real thing, this is as scary as a dollar store plushie. This is only a construct that feeds off the victim’s fear. The more afraid the victim, the more damage done by the construct. But I’m not afraid, not even the slightest bit. So all it is doing is slobbering my hand. I muffle the laughter I feel, and just stare at the boys. “Seriously.” My voice is level and calm, which only unnerves them. “You heard stories about Weaver and the things he has done and this is what you come up with? I’ve dropped shits that were more damaging than this. You’re so out of your league, it would be an insult for me to step down and deal with you properly. For fuck’s sake, guys. If you’re going to terrorize people with this, pick on someone that scares easy. Like your mother.” A snap of my wrist and the construct is shredded to pieces. I reach forward and wipe my drenched hand on the shirt of the nearest ‘boy’. Bidding them a good day, I push past them and continue skateboarding towards the City.

Behind me, I hear them ganging up on the speaker. “I thought you said you knew him! I thought you said you got the drop on him before! The fuck! Did you see how he ripped the devourer to pieces? And not a mark on him! Fuck you!” I hummed happily to myself in contentment. The day came to an end, and with it, the dream.

Make of that, what you may.