A close friend of mine, I call him “Pharoah” here, formally introduced me to invoking the planets two years ago. I completely dismissed the idea because of my lack of magickal experience. Didn’t invoking planetary powers require all sorts of props, preparations, and solitude? I lacked all three. He corrected my errors and showed me a way to touch upon the planetary powers using the tarot cards for assistance.
Since doing so, two of the planets have made many stage entrances in my dreams. Jupiter and Saturn. The first time I saw them in a dream, I knew who they were each the personification of even though they looked nothing like the traditional aspects written of and portrayed through lore and art. Jupiter has only made a few appearances, preferring instead to use his messenger.
Saturn, however, is a chatty little girl. Yes. Little. Girl. The gender switch feels like a deliberate act. One that stabs at a tender spot in me, about my own confusions over gender and sex. In trying to describe the overall feel of Saturn’s dream appearance, I could only come up with the tantalizing confusion that is Gothic Lolita.
The first time Saturn appeared to me as such, I challenged the presence. “Shouldn’t you appear as a wizened old man, with a scythe in one hand and a hand full of wheat in the other?” She laughed the fairy sounds of youth. I continued blathering on. “I can’t tell if you’re going to a cosplay or a wake!”
Her silver eyes glinted as she spoke her one syllable answer to my challenge. “Yes.” That’s when I learned to shut up and not be fooled by appearances. Her voice was teenage sweet and feminine light to the ear. But I could hear an undertone and an echo. This was the voice of ages. This was the voice of time. What was appearances to one as ancient as him/her?
Saturn appeared as a short teenage girl. Slender of build, light of complexion. She could easily pass for a fifteen year old. Short of height, even with the heeled boots she stood barely five feet tall. She has an “every girl” type of face. Long reddish-blond hair, but it falls in thick ropes of curls. Her hair is often pulled back into two high placed ponytails towards the rear of her head. Lengths of black ribbon lace holding the ponytails, with the extra lengths falling free to intermingle with the thick curls.
She is dressed in black lace. An occasional silver trim or accoutrement. Always lace gloves, she is never barehanded. Never a parasol. Occasionally, a black lace headcovering or hat with black lace trim flowing from it. It’s hard to describe her clothing, because everything she has on is BLACK! And she looks pretty good in it.
Always. ALWAYS. A cheery disposition. Even when she is telling me something I’d rather not hear. Delightfully mannered. A vocabulary that stumps me at times. She is an echo from an age I’ve only read about, and a harbinger to an age yet imagined.
She usually appears to discuss long range issues, both in my history and plans yet to be made. The first time Saturn appeared to me (along side Jupiter), it was to tell me to start recording my experiences and experiments. She held a journal in her hands that day, a reflection of an empty journal I had already purchased and neglected. She carries that book still, every time I view her. Sometimes she will open it and read to me entries I have made in any of my recording devices, and observations she has made. Usually, she just hits me with it upside the head. I don’t use that particular book anymore, but I still record experiences and experiments.
Her most recent appearance was in an afternoon nap’s dream. I had seen an image that reminded me of the thrice-twisted moebius strip in the Thoth Universe (XXI) card. Being reminded of the card led to a confusion about if the card symbolized planetary Saturn. (I’m learning!) Fortunately, my call for help was answered. The seed of the dream was (unintentionally) planted with a Tumblr post from @ThelemicWaves.
When I opened my eyes in the dream, I knew right away that I was in that other world. If I had any doubts, being in freefall thousands and thousands of feet above the surface of the earth would have quickly corrected me. I was in my everyday clothes, which just happens to NOT have a parachute equipped. Good thing I’m dreaming. I spend a few seconds, enjoying the sensation when I realize I am not alone. I look over my right shoulder, and bright eyed Saturn is free falling with me, clutching the suede journal tightly to her chest. She sees me eying her and laughs.
We exchange greetings and pleasantries, as best as one can when in freefall. She asks me a question about the difference between kinetic and potential energy. Our discussion and conversation begins. I realize the surface of the earth should be terribly close and twist my body to view what should be the rapidly approaching landscape. To my surprise, I am still thousands and thousands of feet away.
Saturn explains the Earth is still forming, “the descent is not yet complete at this stage”. ThelemicWaves’ glyph comes to mind, and I get a glimmer of understanding.
I ask her what will she do when the Earth is completed. “Return, of course. I’d be a Fool not to.”
While I ponder on the meanings of her words, she tells me that my descent has already completed. I ask her if it was already completed, why was I still falling in the dream.
“Falling is easy. Returning, now that takes Work.”
I don’t notice the surface of my Earth rapidly coming up to me. I impact the dirt and wake with a jerk in my bed.