Category: A Different Way

  • The Crossed Ring

    September 18, 2017. Shortly before dawn… «I accept. … your next step … will be to obtain this ring.» He lifted his right hand and twisted the small gold signet ring on his right little finger. “To obtain that ring is to bind you to me… or to bind me to you. Won’t have need…

  • A Prayer Couldn’t Hurt

    As 2019 comes to a close, so does my inventory of tools, talismans, and tchotchkes that I have in my stockpile for the year. Quite a few of them wound up being acquired and/or kept for the wrong reasons and were properly disposed of. This left me with few tools for “immediate” work. Like an…

  • A Rough Spot

    A month ago, I bought a guitar. I plinked on it every night for practice and had started to build up a set of calluses on my fret hand’s fingertips. I didn’t mind it. They felt more like a badge of advancement than the loss of someone else’s ideals.

  • The Absence of Fear

    On April 18, JLR Kruse asked me: “Also, how do you feel now afterwards? Do you still feel afraid of the black armored angel?” And I answered what was a true answer at the time of: “To be honest, I don’t know. There is the memory of fear and the anticipation that it will occur…

  • Feeding the Bones

    Still unpacking, though it is more emotional baggage than physical stuff. Still haven’t done any “high working”. I don’t have the spirit in me. (Pun very fucking intended.) It took four months before I realized I could leave more than just my tarot decks and occult(ish) books on my table. It’s been a long while…

  • A Strange Herb

    The first occurence of this dream happened several weeks ago. The scene was so quick, it was easy to dismiss it as the echo of a commercial or some scene I read in a mostly forgotten text. But the dream persisted in repeating until I recognized it. The dream begins to reveal I am standing…

  • Larger On The Outside

    Dter1 went back to my parents’ house to pick up any mail still going there. It was her first time setting foot at the property since leaving the week before Christmas. I could tell something was bothering her after she came home, but I did not pry. She remained apart from me for an hour…

  • Blue Shift

    Until yesterday, astronomical events didn’t fuck with me any more or any less that any other person on this planet. Eclipses were a time of detached observation and an excuse to indulge in terrible puns while teasing the local doomsayer. I knew there would be a solar eclipse yesterday, that the only area affected by…

  • Home Is Where The Coffee Is

    The night was not pleasant. Too many distractions built up from the week meant I didn’t recognize calls and tells until after the window for answering them had closed. My sense of disconnection deepens and I fear I have recognized my errors too late to remedy them. All night I had dreams of a wanderer…

  • Winner’s Remorse

    January was full of revelations. I always knew I was being played by “The Spirits”, but finding out just how far the game went really fucking hurt. The degree to which the things I took for granted were just smoke and mirrors meant to distract me made me despondent. Whole fortresses were revealed as vain…