What I’m confident I have learned in the past thirty days:
- [Patient Caller] is not “a formal” grimoire spirit, but the format was necessary for me to get my head in the right space to deal with him.
- It’s going to take a lot more than what I currently have to do any kind of serious grimoire or Solomonic work for any kind of result.
- Fuck ups have little to no upfront cost. But that first payment is going to bite you in the ass for sure.
- I can face my fears and no one can face them but me.
Despite being told plainly that the cord I had placed for him was useless, I laid it out anyway. It only took twenty-nine days to make it a habit. When he appeared, it was with slow deliberation. Scent being the only marker with both eyes open and eyes closed, then the false flame and smoke. The false smoke bending to coil around a suddenly appearing right little finger before flowing to smother and soak into the small amber piece. Nothing was said for a time.
“I see your clothing has shades of green again.”
«From your perspective, yes.»
“Is that your color, then? Or an indulgence towards me?”
He did not answer, but smiled in humor. I had an idea what pun I had just unintentionally made, but I left it on the table between us.
Silence kept us company again. He waited patiently with his hands clasped behind the amber piece. I held the thin brown book in my lap.
“This doesn’t seem real. After all I have seen and heard and felt and experienced, today is the day that this doesn’t seem real. But your critique of my inventory yesterday left out something very important, and it is the most critical piece of all. The environment. I could spend thirty hours self-critiquing this space, the space I live in, and why not a damn good thing should have happened, except this was the door you have been waiting for me to open.”
«It was not necessary. You knew even before you dared to call upon Birto that this place is not beneficial to your goals. It was your hope that your tools would overcome that inadequacy. It is my hope that I have corrected you.»
“Aye. You have.”
As part of my preparation for this last ritual, I had retrieved and included with the tools for pre-ritual consecration, the Hierophant (or equivalent) tarot card from the decks I have not yet placed into storage. With formal deliberation, I now took those cards from the thin brown book where I had tucked them for ritual and announced each card as I laid them on the Book of Oberon that served as [Patient Caller’s] podium.
- The Hierophant from the Wyzard of Odd tarot.
- Faith from the Legacy of the Divine tarot.
- The Hierophant from the Universal Waite tarot.
- The Hierophant from the Red Magician tarot.
- The Seer from the Fey Tarot.
- The Hierophant from the Bosch Tarot.
- The Hierophant from the Sweeney Tarot.
- The Hierophant from the Stairs of Gold tarot.
“I know the entanglement is already complete, and that we have been bound to each other by mutual agreement. But I do not want to end these thirty days with a mere command to stay out of relative trouble. In lieu of the Apophenia Invitation, which gave you carte blanche to do what the fuck ever until I next summoned you again, I confirm your entanglement with the Hierophant tarot card before giving you license to depart. Before I end this ritual, and with it my obligation, have you anything to say?”
He smiled. «Your wording of the entanglement includes a license to depart. If I were contrary, I could make the argument that your formal license to depart renders moot the command to appear when summoned via the card.» He spread his hands and the rings glittered in the light. «But I am not contrary, and it is the will of my master and the will of the Good Lord God over us both that I do all in my power to help you succeed. I will comply with the command.»
I wanted to say many a dozen expletives at his timing and his smug demeanor. I will save those remarks for after my life settles down.
I placed his amber piece and label on the stack of eight cards beside them. I raised my right hand over it and spoke the entanglement again. I made the sign of the cross over the cards and watched him mirror my movements. Leaving the amber on the cards, I spoke the License to Depart (and noted what he was saying about the nullification of the command). His form dissolved and flowed into the amber and the cards.
I took the black knife and stood. As I slowly turned, I recited Psalm 54 one last time. Facing the table, I said with force, “Go all now in peace.” Quietly, I closed the folding knife and began putting away the tools so I could face the day. The useless cord was thrown into my generic craft bag for use with mundane projects. I will prepare the ritual items for storage later.
When I removed the amulet as the very last step in cleaning up, my ears popped and I was chilled as an unseen source of warmth and comfort was removed. I sat in the now clean space and felt like crying. If anyone came in, they would not know what had transpired not even an hour before. My thirty day obligation has been completed.
Time to get in other shit.
Total ritual time: 54 minutes.
Go all now in peace.